When we were kids, me and my sister had this weird unspoken agreement with my parents about swearing.

We knew they swore, and they knew we swore, but as long as we didn’t swear around each other, everything was dandy.

Sure, occasionally one of us would slip up, and on a trip to Ireland they gave us permission to say “feck” (which, on reflection, was pretty inappropriate), but by and large we all stuck to the deal.

Then once I’d turned sixteen the curse was lifted, and all of our vocabularies were elevated.

This was something that just happened, I accepted, and that was it. But looking back now, why did that happen?

In theory, the answer is “because swearing is offensive”.

But who was it offensive to?

I didn’t care, my sister didn’t care, and—based on how quickly they reintroduced the f-bomb back into their vocabulary—my parents certainly didn’t care.

Yet we all went along with it for over a decade and a half.

In reality, the reason we all went along with this bizarre charade is that other people might find it offensive. If ten-year-old me was walking through Morrisons effing and jeffing to my dad about my day at school, it would probably raise some eyebrows.

Maybe an elderly shopper would tut in my direction!

But really, who cares if a geriatric curmudgeon doesn’t like it? Even if they judge my dad because somehow they equate vulgar language to the quality of his parenting, so what? They’re a stranger, and their opinion is meaningless.

Caveat: Unless the elderly shopper is either of my grandmas. Their opinions matter a lot, and young me would never swear in front of either of them.

The thing that got me thinking about all this was a debate on LinkedIn where the original poster Andy Robson made this point:

“I’m not offended by people swearing around me, but some people are. So why risk offending them by splashing swear words around in print?”

And on the surface of it, I get where he’s coming from. If not swearing offends no people, and swearing offends some people, surely the former is the best option. Right?

Well, it’s not that simple. And it also relies heavily on the assumption that offending someone is a bad thing.

But I’ll tell you a secret…

Offending someone isn’t inherently bad

Here are three statements:

• Nottingham Forest are better than Derby County

• Pineapple belongs on pizza

• The world would be a better place without men

Do you want to guess what all three of these have in common? That’s right, they could all cause offense.

The first statement could offend Derby fans, the second could offend pizza traditionalists, and the third could offend the 50% of society that creates 99.9% of the problems.

So the problem with trying to not offend is that you become somewhat limited in what you can say.

“It's Finger-Lickin' Good” could offend bilateral amputees, “Think Different” could offend neurodivergent people, and “Just do it” could offend suicide prevention professionals.

Does that mean KFC, Apple, and Nike were wrong to use these slogans? Of course not.

That’s because we have a magical thing called context.

If the Samaritans adopted the “Just do it” tagline, there would be a problem. But people know Nike sells sporting goods, so it makes sense in that context.

The key is to only offend the right people

I genuinely believe it’s absolutely fine to offend people with your marketing, but only if it’s the right people.

Say you’re trying to market a device that uses special sensors combined with AI to evaluate the quality and taste of wine. It pairs with an app that gives you tasting notes, and historical information about that wine.

This is a great tool for people who want to learn more about wine, but can’t afford wine-tasting lessons.

“A sommelier in your pocket” is the tagline you go for. But immediately after launch, you receive a tirade of complaints in your inbox:

• “I’m a trained sommelier, and I find it offensive that you’d claim a device could replace me!”

• “My wife and I travel around the vineyards of France every summer to learn about wine, and I’m disgusted by your claims that an app could do the same thing!!”

• “What’s a sommelier?”

You’ve offended these people, but should you care?

Nope. 

The first two were never going to be your target market, and the third could easily have Googled the definition.

As long as your copy appeals to the people you want to sell to, it’s absolutely fine to offend other people. In fact, it’s inevitable!

The only way to avoid offending is by saying nothing worth saying.

So, what about swearing?

We started this blog talking about swearing, and how some people believe it best not to swear at all.

Sure, this is one way to reduce your chance of offending. But as I’ve already mentioned, it all depends on the context.

If you’re promoting a kid's cereal, it would be inappropriate in that context to swear. Just like it would be inappropriate to include a free comic called ‘Norma the Nymphomaniac Narwhale’.

But if you know your target customers won’t mind a bit of playful swearing, then what’s the problem? Your job is to talk to them!

Worst case scenario, an elderly person happens upon your marketing, and tuts in your direction.

But who gives a fuck?